"These commandments that I give you today are to be on your hearts.
Impress them on your children. Talk about them when you sit at home and when you walk along the road, when you lie down and when you get up.
Tie them as symbols on your hands and bind them on your foreheads.
Write them on the door frames of your houses and on your gates."
I have always enjoyed getting into deep thinking especially biblical. When I was a child I would hear my parents all the time talking scripture. No joke! At the time I would pick up small pieces of their conversations. I would usually think about it for a moment and then go back to playing with whatever I was playing with at the time, but it wasn't forgotten. I remember family devotions. Sometimes for a child a little to long, but..... I don't look back and wish it was any other way. It made a huge difference in who I am today.
Dennis and I often get into deep thinking. Challenging thinking. We will ask each other theological questions and what I love the most is we aren't afraid to say what we think and be challenged. We challenge each other to look beyond our comfort, beyond what we have always heard, and beyond each other, but into what the Truth speaks and not what we want the truth to speak.
I am beyond convinced that this has strengthened our marriage and brought us that much closer to each other. This brings me to my topic.
Guilt or Faith Desire?
This came up the other morning while we were laying on the couch enjoying coffee and the darkness outside, before the children got up. We by all means aren't experts in raising children. We are still learning everyday, but we both have an advantage that a lot of people don't. We both came from not only godly parents, but one's that strive to instill biblical truths into us.
We were thinking of two different ways a lot of parents parent.
Guilt -(We feel the most common) With observing other parents, helping with youth and just reading parenting books, guilt is a major issues with little awareness. I will admit that even being aware of it guilt can creep it's way into how you discipline or react to your children.
Taking the time to explain to your child why they need to obey is very important. The importance of displaying and setting an example yourself for the true love and desire to serve our Savior is also key.
* Why do you attend church?
* Why do you read your Bible?
* Why do you get involved in any activity? school? church? work?
* Why do you serve your spouse?
* Why do you discipline your children?
* Why do you serve?
And...... this list can continue. Where is your heart? Is your heart there for self- gratification or self-recognition or from the love of the Lord?
Guilt raising can be very dangerous. Impressing on your children the real reason why they need to obey is so important. Or even further then that teaching them the true desire to serve and love the Lord God with all their heart.
I often have to remind myself due to my flesh nature with the importance of taking the time to explain to my children the questions of why!
Faith Desire - Instilling Biblical truths, by showing and explaining scripture. Setting the example yourself is one big way. Our are actions to glorify our Savior? If not are you willing to apologize for your actions? We aren't perfect, but having the heart to ask for forgiveness is a big step. I have more then once had to apologize to the kids for the way my tone of voice was or how my actions were. I'm not saying this to pat myself on the back, but to clarify that even as I write this I clearly can see my faults but my desire though is to try to live my life non other then to Glorify the Lord.
Showing my kids my desire to love the lord fully results through many actions. The way I respond and treat my husband. The way I discipline my children and how I also respond and treat them. How do family and friends see my heart? Truly only God knows my motives, but I feel your family and close friends also can see someones heart to an extent.
Raising my children with the desire to give their full life over to the Lord is more important then anything else. Showing them to live their life not out of guilt, but by being saved we have a freedom and as a believer a burning desire to please our Savior.
I'm still far from perfect, but I feel through scripture by having that freedom in Desire over guilt will be life changing and motivationally rewarding. It has given Dennis and I a peace about raising our children. We aren't raising our children with a guilt enforced outcome, but with a true desire to teach them to live their life for our Savior Jesus Christ. Mistakes will still happen, and sin is still present. Having that desire instilled in ones heart truly motivates ones actions and life. A deep happiness is present, and a true willingness is displayed.
Therefore, since we have been justified through faith, we
have peace with God through our Lord Jesus Christ,
through whom we have gained access by faith into this grace in which we now stand. And we
boast in the hope of the glory of God.
Not only so, but we
also glory in our sufferings, because we know that suffering produces perseverance;
perseverance, character; and character, hope.
And hope does not put us to shame, because God’s love has been poured out into our hearts through the Holy Spirit, who has been given to us.
You see, at just the right time, when we were still powerless, Christ died for the ungodly.
Very rarely will anyone die for a righteous person, though for a good person someone might possibly dare to die.
But God demonstrates his own love for us in this: While we were still sinners, Christ died for us.
Since we have now been justified by his blood, how much more shall we be saved from God’s wrath through him!
For if, while we were God’s enemies, we were reconciled to him through the death of his Son, how much more, having been reconciled, shall we be saved through his life!
Not only is this so, but we also boast in God through our Lord Jesus Christ, through whom we have now received reconciliation."